20 week scan: The verdict is in…

Let’s not beat about the bush here, the 20 week scan was not as magical as I would have liked it to be. The lovely midwife conducting the scan admitted that she hated computers so just rushed through these things to get them over with quickly. Don’t get me wrong, she did give us a running dialogue the whole way through but was very quietly spoken and clearly had zero sense of humour which just zapped the fun for me.

Have you ever looked up at clouds in the sky and pictured what their physical shape looks like? Well, upon the midwife examining the four quadrants of the heart, it suddenly dawned on me. Our baby’s heart looked like a dancing baby Groot!

Photo: Marvel Studios

You know the one, where he is replanted and still in the pot, waving his arms in the air from side to side. Yes, really! It was such a magical moment that I had to point it out. Unfortunately, the magic ended there as the midwife clearly had either not seen Guardians of the Galaxy or just had no interest in it whatsoever. But I know, and you can’t take that away from me.


After seeing lots of fast moving, blurry lines moving across the screen it was finally announced that our baby was healthy and developing normally. Precisely on the average line as it goes. But then I always was ‘average’. I’m thinking of reinstating my Mary Poppins status ‘practically perfect in every way’ as I prefer this to just ‘average’.

Then, onto the sexing. That exciting moment we were waiting for. We were advised that if it is a boy we would see some clearly obvious bits but, I mean, I’m staring at a fuzzy screen of wavy lines here. How obvious is obvious to a layman? Apparently, if it is a girl we would see three white lines. You know, that well documented, international symbol for girl. None of this is helpful to me in the slightest but I obviously do not admit that. Then, bang! There it was in front of us. Three white lines. I think, Is it? The midwife goes in for another look and boom! Three white lines again. Ok, you got me, I am convinced. I have seen nothing ‘obvious’ but I have seen ‘three white lines’.


So, we are having a girl then? Right now I am hoping and praying that the scan was correct as our house has suddenly exploded in a sea of pink gifts and I do not want to be having a conversation with a son when he grows up, trying to explain why he was dressed as a girl for the first few months of his life…

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